Today marks two years since my husband and I stood up in a tiny little church and said “I do”. Two years since that totally gorgeous day, when the sun shone brightly, despite the forecast of rain. Two years since all of the people we love the most filled a dancefloor together, high on cake and love and one too many cocktails.
It’s fair to say that our second year of marriage has been rather uneventful. There have been a couple of lovely holidays and some home renovations to keep us busy, but after 3 or 4 years of milestone moments and whirlwind excitement, the past 12 months have felt rather unremarkable. And yet, there is no denying that this has been the happiest year of my life.
I think that’s a good sign. I remember worrying after the wedding that we wouldn’t be able to sustain that level of love and joy for all of the years to come. That we’d need to keep chasing the next big high in order to feel content, that without the excitement, the cracks would start to show. And yet, the opposite has been true. What we’ve found is that our marriage isn’t built on milestone moments or grand gestures, it’s built on the little things.
It’s built on the cups of tea that Sam brings to me in bed each morning. It’s built on the evenings curled up on the sofa with the cat, watching just one more episode of the latest boxset. It’s built on the Sunday afternoons spent walking in the countryside and enjoying a roast dinner and a pint in a cosy pub. It’s built on hours spent in the kitchen together, one of us cooking dinner while the other talks about their day. Our marriage is built on those routine, mundane bits of life that feel like total magic when you’re doing them with someone you love by your side.
I know that not every year of our marriage will be like this, that the future will hold more highs and lows for us. I know that we still have so many heart bursting memories to make together, and I know that there will be challenges and dark moments sent to test us too. But I feel content in the knowledge that we don’t need those big moments to be happy. That we don’t need those highs or lows to prove how solid we are. That our small life, full of our little routines and idiosyncrasies is more than enough for us.
And I think that’s what marriage is really all about - it’s showing up day after day for each other, it’s committing to making the life we share together that little bit brighter. It’s finding joy in even the most mundane of tasks, because we get to tackle them side by side. It’s knowing that no matter what life throws at us, we’re a team and we’ll weather it together.
And I can honestly say that there is nobody in the world that I’d rather be on a team with than Sam. I hope that one day these two years will feel like just a blink of an eye in the span of a long and happy marriage, and I hope that we’re just as content to potter through this life together when we’re old and grey.
Happy anniversary, my love.